The Breast of Humanity

Inspire me

I am realising lately that I am so blessed to have such great friends. I am also realising that they inspire me in many various ways. I have started doing more crafty things because Little X really seemed to like doing it with a friend of mine when she babysat for me. I have started really desiring time to be alone and work out the kinks (so to say) in my body because of another friend who really really enjoys working out. I have started painting because of yet another friend who makes such beautiful artwork. I have also started doing more graphics work again because of another friend who is getting into that. I felt so inspired to do so many things and yet I am still doing nothing it seems. The little man and I have painted now two days in a row. I have been working on a picture on the computer for about three days now, it still isn't finished though. I have been doing fun crafty things that include the spawn. But why can I not get moving? Why is it those things that involve me sitting in one place I do with great enjoyment, and yet I can't make the time to get out (or even stay in) and get moving? I have been wanting for some time to get back into biking. I even went and got my bicycle out of the storage unit and reinflated the tires. So why can I not ask my mom to watch the kids for fifteen minutes while I cruise the neighborhood? It is a good nieghborhood for biking. A nice big challenging hill and a gentle hill for building good endurance. So, why can't I remember to do it? Or do I choose not to? Am I so at odds with the idea of doing physical work that I completely squash the idea upon birth? One of my friends (the one that is enjoying working out) said it perfectly this afternoon. She was talking about how easy it became for her after she realised that she was finished having kids. I never thought about it, but that was my main road block. After the mini-man was born, I didn't care (well, I cared that I felt big, but I didn't care enough to do something about it). I thought that surely when he gets to an age that he is running around, that was when I would lose weight, because I would be chasing him, right? Wrong. A second child and a bad bout of pneumonia was what helped me lose that baby weight. Now, I feel like I am waiting around for the little lady to be done nursing before I do something. I do not want a lazy family, but what am I doing but creating one by my own inactivity. I want to be kicked in the butt. I want to be inspired more. I want to move and be moved. I want to touch as I have been touched. I want to inspire as I have been inspired.

posted by Jedi Master Deba Sing @ 5:40 PM 0 comments